NLE rating

100 words

• jenniferkayeLducao
• princess
• XIIXXIIIXCI
• Duuudles.♥
• COKE & ICE CREAM
• LOVE the people who treat you right, FORGIVE the ones who don't.
• Happiness && Peace && Love
• F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
• The sound of music
• Care. Knowledge. Compassion
• To DANCE is to be yourself. Larger.  More beautiful. More powerful.
• Perfection
• Smiles, Hugs and Kisses
• Breathe
• I-could-not-ask-for-more moments
• Weddings
• Shooboiiee
• I will be still and know you are GOD
• Life is too short to be anything but happy
• Hakunamatata!
• Blaaaah, Wooooots and Huwaaaaaws.
• This too shall pass. =)

The Person I Want You To Date

I don't know who you are but i want great things for you. I want you to have romance and committed love and something REAL. Something that lasts. That's really hard to come by these days but I want that for you and I want that for me, too. Here are some of the things i wish i could tell my future children about love. To be honest, i don't know if i'm ever going to get married and have kids but that's okay... I'll pass these things on to you instead. You, my friend, are worthy of great, authentic love.

The person i want you to date exists and i want you to wait it out until you meet them. Because, in case you haven't yet, you will. Waiting is for the brave - it means watching years pass, noticing yourself growing older and sitting through wedding after wedding after wedding. It means bottling that slow-rising fear. It means questioning your standards and running the risk of settling.

I wish someone had told me that the person i was meant to be with was a real actual living person, breathing in some part of the world and waiting, too. I did not believe in romantic destiny so i projected all my hopes into the wrong people and tried desperately to make these wrong people right. In the end, no one won and the aftermath was a combination of devastating grief, self-loathing and crippilng regret. I do not want that for you.

Wait.

The person i want you to date might be making morning coffee right now or sleeping through a thunderstorm or getting a degree in Physics. Wait. I mean it.

EVERY OTHER PERSON WILL BE A CHEAP IMITATION OF THE REAL THING.

The person i want you to date BELIEVES IN BIG THINGS. This person has a PASSION and pursues it with a hunger that could set the world on fire. This person believes in setting goals and making them happen.

Trust me: You will never regret being with someone who is MADLY IN LOVE WITH THEIR PURPOSE IN LIFE.

When you meet this person - this unstoppable ball of good fury - I want you to have a vision of your own.

A goal you can shape your life around. I want you to have a desire to change the world, whatever pocket of it you belong to. You can't be stagnant when the person you're with is active and dynamic. Life is a grand celebration of doing great things that matter and you (yes, you) play a huge part in all of it.

The person i want you to date has CHARACTER. When you're young, all you're looking for is personality. Charm. Compatibility in music and book taste and food preferences. I think these are all well and good but character is what sustains a relationship when all of these thins change. Personality is ever-evolving, character grows and amplifies in time. Character is when a person does beautiful things without seeking credit. It's when someone DOESN'T QUIT - even if EVERY FIBER OF THEIR BEING BEGS THEM TO. It's the ability of someone to graciously extend back-breaking heart-wrenching love to someone who has DISAPPOINTED AND FAILED THEM. CHARACTER is that beautiful thing that gets molded over time and experience. BE SOMEONE WITH CHARACTER AND NEVER SETTLE FOR SOMEONE WITHOUT IT.

The person i want you to date will be into you. REally, really into you. There will be no need for pointless mind games, no room for even the slightest bit of emotional confusion. The person i want you to date will be crystal clear about their intentions towards you. They will not win you over with sweet nothings or romantic gestures. Their love will be bigger than the superficial trappings of courtship. The person i want you to date will take the time to know you. They will see everything there is to love about you and they will look at the core of all the bad stuff and not walk. They will not run at the first sight of ugliness..

Instead, they will love you through it.

I want you to know tha the person i want you to date will fail you. Give them the grace to be human.  (You are one, too.) Don't listen to those stupid quotes that tell you that the person who loves you will never make you cry. I want you to realistically approach this thing we call human relationships. Hurting one another is part of the messy dynamics of getting close to someone. But the person i want you to date is a person who knows how to RESOLVE CONFLICT especially when it blows up in both your faces. THEIR EGO WILL NEVER BE TOO BIG TO OWN UP TO THEIR MISTAKES.

And when it comes to their love for you, YOU WILL KNOW. Their love will be the most painfully obvious thing in the world that though you will come to question many, many things in life, you will never - not even once - question them.

And you know what? They will believe in you so much that you will never feel compelled to question yourself. You will put all your insecurities to rest because  the person i want you to date will, more than anything, make you feel that you matter. ALWAYS. And you know why? Because you do.

I'm sure it sounds like a long shot but what if you dared to believe tha tthe person i want you to date is real? Love is greater than cynicism and this is what i believe - yes, me, the last single girl in the world: While some people think this all sounds too good to be true, there is a God who is out to give us things that are much too good to be false.

Believe. Don't settle. And in the meantime:

Become the person that the person you're looking for is looking for.

from: a Facebook friend's note. =)

People can be cruel, and sometimes they will be.  People can hurt you and break your heart, and sometimes they will.  But only YOU can allow them to continuously hurt you.  Value yourself enough to choose to spend time with people who treat you the way you treat them.  Know your worth.  Know when you have had enough.  And move on from the people who keep chipping away at your happiness.

from 20 Bad Habits Holding Good People Back

5 Moments When You Realize You Need More Friends - (Ryan O'Connell)

That moment when all you want to do is lie in bed and watch TV all day but don’t really wanna do it alone. You’re feeling medium anti-social but you know that if you don’t hang out with someone, you risk falling into a serious fugue. So you scan the contacts in your phone and realize that you would need to do some sort of activity in order to hang out with most of your friends. You might really like them and have lots of fun together but you aren’t on that level where you can have long moments of silence together. You need more friends like that.

That moment when you score an invite to a cool opening or party and have a plus one. It’s going to be a specific kind of crowd where you’ll need to bring the certain kind of friend. You rack your brain and realize that no one in your social life would really fit in or have fun. You don’t want to go alone so you just stay home and are bitter, thinking about how you need more friends like who are more *insert description here*

That moment when you’re sick and need to ask your friends for help. When you think about whom to ask though you’re disheartened by the lack of options. “WTF?” you think to yourself. “When did I realize that my friends were all evil?”

That moment when you’re in a giant group of people and you still feel completely alone and alienated. You realize you don’t respect most of the people around you and need to find a new group of people who are more like you. This realization sucks. You can spend years cultivating bogus friendships and have to start all over again in order to have a satisfying social life.

That moment when you realize all of your friends got into relationships or consumed by work and it’s Saturday afternoon and you have no one to call. This moment has crept on you. You had no idea that it had already came to this but here you are. La-dee-da. It’s enough to make you miss high school when the friends may have been fairweathered, but boy were they plentiful.  http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/5-moments-when-you-realize-you-need-more-friends/

Well, his words may be too strong, (and i don't perfectly agree with the title) but at the moment, i really don't mind. If this was facebook and there's a RELATE button, I'd click on it as many times as I can. WALA.LUNGS. This is just one of those times when suddenly i feel sad. I can name all the friends i have/i've had... then realizing how i can't seem to call on to someone to relieve me from my spur of the moment sadness.  blaaaaah., unsay labot. =p

eyes

grad pics

70 days old rant

it's quite sad when the only thing people can say about you is that you dance well. after all you've done, or atleast tried to do... it's the only adjective they can think of to describe you. Not that i'm ungrateful for such compliment... i just think I've done much more than dancing well. -december 20, 2011

i'm counting days! =)

grad pics are out. will post photos sooon. =))

blah2x

i'm soooo tired of going after the people of the past. when will i ever learn understand that no matter how happy your lives had been together, things change. ALWAYS! People come and go. If they don't stay, then you have to let go. That's just how it is. But it's hard. i hate change. rawr.  =( Goodmorning.

...

Bold the ones you’ve done in your life:

• 1. had sex
• 2. bought condoms
• 3. gotten pregnant
• 4. failed a class (failed in quizzes, major exams, but not classes.)
• 5. kissed a boy 
• 6. kissed a girl
• 7. used a little paper bag for lunch
• 8. had a job (got paid forr dancing, that counts right?)
• 9. slipped on ice
• 10. missed the bus
• 11. left the house without my wallet/purse
• 12. bullied someone on the internet
• 13. sexted
• 14. had sex in public
• 15. played on a sports team (softball!)
• 16. smoked weed 
• 17. smoked cigarettes
• 18. smoked a cigar
• 19. drank alcohol
• 20. watched “The Breakfast Club”
• 21. been overweight
• 22. been underweight
• 23. had an eating disorder
• 24. been to a wedding
• 25. made fun of someone for being fat 
• 26. been on the computer for 5 hours straight
• 27. watched tv for 5 hours straight
• 28. been late for work
• 29. been late for school (always)
• 30. kissed someone in the rain
• 31. showered with someone else (required during camping/sleepovers/bathing after beach =))
• 32. failed my drivers test
• 33. ran a mile in less than 10 minutes
• 34. been outside my home country
• 35. been on a road trip longer than 5 hours 
• 36. had someone break your heart
• 37. had a credit card
• 38. been to a professional sports game
• 49. broken a bone
• 40. been unhappy about my weight
• 41. won a trophy (medals ra bitaw)
• 42. cut myself
• 43. had an STD
• 44. got engaged
• 45. been on a diet
• 46. tried out to be on a tv show
• 47. rode in a taxi
• 48. been to prom
• 49. played in a drinking game
• 50. stayed up for 24 hours or more
• 51. been to a concert
• 52. had a three-some
• 53. had a crush on someone of the same sex
• 54. been in a car accident
• 55. had braces
• 56. learned another language 
• 57. killed a bug
• 58. been at a yard sale
• 59. been to a japanese steakhouse
• 60. wore make up
• 61. talked to someone via webcam
• 62. lost my virginity before I was 16
• 63. had my wisdom teeth taken out
• 64. kissed someone a different race than myself (that little japanese boy: kento pag grad bash)
• 65. snuck out of the house ( i don't need to =p)
• 66. bought porn
• 67. had a virus on my computer
• 68. had oral sex
• 69. dyed my hair
• 70. gone skinny dipping
• 71. graduated from college 
• 72. wore someone else’s clothes
• 73. voted in a election
• 74. rode in an ambulance
• 75. rode in a helicopter
• 76. caught the stove on fire
• 77. got in a verbal fight
• 78. been on vacation
• 79. been on an airplane
• 80. been on a boat
• 81. had surgery
• 82. kissed someone before I was 14
• 83. beat a video game
• 84. found something valuable on the ground
• 85. made a survey
• 86. stalked someone on facebook
• 87. prank called someone
• 88. been to a library outside of school
• 89. spent over $100 shopping in one day
• 90. cut my hair and hated it
• 91. peed outside
• 92. went fishing
• 93. helped with charity
• 94. taken a pregnancy test (not mine though, sa patient sa E.R. haha)
• 95. been rejected by a crush
• 96. been suspended from school 
• 97. broken a mirror
• 98. faked sick from school
• 99. owned a pet
• 100. been to six flags

 purpled the updates. =)